


Forgiveness

by RoseRose



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bucky Barnes Feels, Jewish Bucky Barnes, M/M, Matchmaker Bucky Barnes, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Pesach | Passover, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Tony Stark Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-23
Updated: 2020-06-23
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:35:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24827659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseRose/pseuds/RoseRose
Summary: Steve and Tony grow close, as friends, before the events of The Winter Soldier. This changes things. So, somehow, Tony finds himself celebrating Passover with Bucky and Steve.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes & Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 10
Kudos: 44
Collections: Iron Man Big Bang 2019/2020





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Huntress79](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Huntress79/gifts), [starksnack](https://archiveofourown.org/users/starksnack/gifts).



> For the IMBB!
> 
> Thank you to the wonderful, talented artists, [Huntress79](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Huntress79) and [starksnack](https://archiveofourown.org/users/starksnack)!
> 
> Thank you to my beta, Nix3994!
> 
> Transliterations are done by me, and are an attempt of transliterating a traditional Ashkenazi pronunciation rather than the modern Israeli Hebrew pronunciation, using various resources.
> 
> Direct Haggadah quotes are from a 1937 Haggadah (The Maxwell House Haggadah), which is the one Bucky has.

Tony suddenly realized how the villains in their Avengers encounters had felt. Captain America was striding towards him, full of righteousness and smouldering anger. He didn't know what he did, but it was time for what he did best - bravado. Act like nothing was wrong, and maybe nothing would be wrong. “So, what can I do for you, Cap?”

“I've been reading about how there are even less union members now than there was when I was a _kid_ or even a teen during the _Great Depression_. This is a travesty! You! You own a company. Tell me your workers are unionized.” The fire in Steve's eyes clearly said the unspoken words in that sentence were 'or else.'

Tony relaxed. This, he could handle. “Yes, they are. And my wage and benefits package is the best in the industry by miles.”

Steve looks him up and down suspiciously. “Really? You're a Stark. Your father wasn’t so much a fan of the little guys. Why would you be any different?”

“Waitasec... You weren't friends with my old man?” Tony suddenly felt as if the rock that had held him up his whole life was now quicksand. If Howard wasn't friends with Steve, then maybe, maybe he was wrong about him? Maybe Steve _wasn't_ going to instantly hate Tony for being a bisexual, atheist liberal. His father sure had, and had made sure Tony knew exactly how much better Captain America would be than that. In fact, Tony was fairly sure his father was turning in his grave over how much he paid the janitors at SI. He'd been horrified when he took over, and while they hadn't gotten quite as much as they did now before Obie... well, before Obie, they had still gotten a significant raise the moment he became CEO.

“Why do you ask?” There was a genuine note of curiosity in Steve's voice. This was far different than anything Tony had ever expected out of Captain America. He wasn't being dismissed, or told he was far worse than his father. He'd go out on a limb, though not all the way out, and see what happened.

“Because he always acted like he knew you well- and that you wouldn't approve of me.” That was a bit more than Tony wanted to share, but unbeknownst to Cap, Tony had been up for about twenty hours working, and was about ready to seek his bed, so a little more got out than he meant to. At least it wasn't for nothing. Tony was gratified to see Steve recoil in horror.

“He barely knew me! I mean, he liked what I had done, and helped me out, but I always felt that was more to prove a point than because he actually liked me. He sure liked to pretend I wasn't a poor Irish Catholic boy, or that I approved of strikes. In fact...” At this point, Steve trailed off in a way Tony had seen before. It was the one he got when memories of the past were a bit too much more bitter than sweet. Sometimes after a minute he changed the subject, other times, like this one, he continued. “My ma actually met Bucky's ma while on strike. Garment workers, they both were. They stayed good friends, even when my ma switched to nursing, and Bucky and I practically grew up together.” Thanks to Howard's not quite accurate picture of the past, Tony had at least some idea of who Bucky was, and how much trust he was getting to hear anything about him. Ugh. He was so bad at this emotional stuff, but he had to try, right?

“Sounds like a good friend.” There. That was both inviting more conversation, but also letting Steve duck out if he felt as uncomfortable as Tony did with all the emotion. Turned out letting it be that open was a big mistake for Tony.

“Yes, but I don't want to talk about him. But, are you telling me right? Howard acted like he was my best friend, that jerk? Oops, sorry, I know he was your father, but he did what?” Tony was going to have to deal with this. He didn't want to have to deal with it, but clearly Steve was bewildered and more than a little bothered by Howard's post-war behavior. That's when Tony decided to fuck it all and either ruin his relationship with Cap or maybe fix it all, because clearly Steve had depths he hadn't previously assigned to Cap.

“Yeah, Cap. He acted like you were the best of friends. Kept telling me how you would feel about something or another, usually when he thought I had done something wrong. God, he was so angry when I came out as bisexual. Said you'd be horrified and angry. That was the exact same thing he said when I sided with Stark Industries workers back when he was still in charge and they wanted a raise. It's also what he said when I suggested promoting a black woman to an executive level position, even when I brought up Gabe Jones and Peggy Carter. Maybe I should have figured out then he was lying to me.” Tony slumped down. His gamble was either going to pay off or he was going to get punched. With this conversation, he wasn't even sure if he cared which. Instead, he got a surprise that shouldn't have been a surprise.

“What's bisexual?” Steve's question broke the tension that had been building, but created its own set. Tony had no idea that SHIELD hadn't brought Steve up to modernity when it came to sex ed, though in retrospect he should have expected it. Apparently he was going to have to give Cap the modern idea of sex ed. And hopefully he won't break anything in the process.

“So, you know how some people are attracted to the same sex?” Tony was cautious, he had no idea what kind of background Steve had on the subject.

“Temperamental, yes, I know about it.”

“Well, bisexuality is being attracted to both the same and opposite sex.” At that, Tony was absolutely shocked to see Steve fully relax.

“Oh, you too?” Looking at Steve's face, the naked relief of having found someone like him was palpable.

“Steve... SHIELD did explain that it's no longer illegal to be gay or bi? Oh wait, slang again... gay is homosexual, bi is bisexual.” Watching Steve slump, Tony realized that no, SHIELD had failed to explain this, and somehow in the couple of months since the Chitauri invasion Steve hadn't learned otherwise.

“I'm... safe? People won't hate me?” Tony hated to crush the burgeoning hope on Steve's face, but he was going to give the whole story.

“Some people still will. Some people still hurt others for it. But, it's not illegal anymore. In fact, in New York, gay people can marry each other.” Tony was touched to witness the joy on Steve's face, and then was disappointed to see it crashing down.

“Wait, _Howard_ , your _father_ , told you I'd be horrified that you were bisexual? I'm sorry, that is completely and utterly wrong. He never knew about me, but he did know I wasn't a bigot and was a supporter of all sorts of people, including homosexuals!” Steve was obviously starting to work himself up into a towering rage.

“Yeah, well, he clearly favored controlling his image more than he cared about being honest about you.” Tony was going to have to do some revising of his opinion on Steve, and Steve may very well have to stop judging Tony. Clearly Howard had been wrong about practically everything.

“I'm sorry I judged you based on him. You're clearly nothing like him, at least where it counts. Maybe, maybe you can help me get accustomed to this time?” The hand held out for Tony to shake was firm, not reluctant. Tony took it.

“I can do that.”


	2. Chapter 2

Over the next couple of years, Steve and Tony grew closer. Tony introduced Steve to the future, and Steve proved he had a wicked sense of humor and was practically a socialist. For that reason, Tony was absolutely baffled that Steve was also a regular churchgoer, going to Mass every Sunday. Of course, the dichotomy shocked the conservative news media as well. There was one Fox News interview Tony played over and over whenever he was feeling down. People may have thought Steve was going to be a bastion of Republican morality when he woke up, and to find he was left of most of the modern Democratic party was a rude awakening for many politicians. Growing closer also morphed Tony's childhood crush on Captain America's muscles into falling desperately in love with his best friend Steve. Tony just had no idea if Steve felt the same way- and he wasn't going to risk it. Then, Steve went to D.C. and all hell broke loose.

For quite a while, Tony was busy putting out fires that resulted from government secrets leaking out onto the web, but he was doing that from a hospital bedside, sitting next to, and getting to know, Sam Wilson. When he saw Steve stir, he had to get the first word in. “I approve of your friends, Capsicle. Wings here seems to be a good one.” Steve winced. “Sorry, the serum is burning through the painkillers a little too fast. You've got some pain relief, but not as much as you should. Also, _what were you thinking?_ You could have called me in!” Tony's voice rose for the last two sentences before a nurse poked her head into the hospital room to glare. “Sorry.” Tony's voice for that last was much quieter.

Steve took a deep breath, wincing again. “Hey, Sam, can you give usa minute?”

“Sure, man. But, take it easy.” Sam patted Steve on the shoulder and left Tony and Steve in a room together. As soon as Sam left, Steve looked up at Tony, but at anywhere other than Tony's eyes.

“Hey, Steve, what's wrong?” Tony knew their friendship was mostly based on humor and politics, but he could tell something was off, and he wanted to make things better.

“I learned something, something that didn't make it into the data dump, that you really should know. You're going to be so angry... but I can't keep it from you.” He kept himself from reaching out, but Tony really wanted to just stop Steve. It looked like the pain of what he was going to say was worse than the pain of all his injuries, which was really saying something. But, Tony couldn't stop Steve. He had to know what he had found out. “First, Bucky is still alive.” At that, Tony practically jumped.

“Your best friend? The one you practically grew up with? How- wait, the serum? He was dosed at Azzano? If he's alive, how are we only just now learning this?” Suddenly Steve had a look on his face he'd seen on Rhodey's the times that he'd guessed military secrets. It's the 'I both love and hate being friends with a genius' face, the one that happened when he got things right.

“I believe so. And the reason, well, the reason we're only just now learning...” Steve trailed off. This time, Tony waited while Steve clearly gathered up both his thoughts and his composure. “After he fell from the train, he was captured by Hydra... and brainwashed into becoming the assassin known as the Winter Soldier.” As soon as Steve said that, Tony gave into instincts and reached out to squeeze Steve's shoulder in solidarity and comfort. Steve continued before Tony had a chance to say anything, though. “He didn't recognize me, definitely not at first, and maybe only barely later. We grew up together, and he had no idea who I was, or even his own name. He only figured it out just in time to keep from killing me...” Steve drifted a bit, but Tony wasn't going to interrupt him until he was clearly done. “You know, I don't think I ever told you... Bucky's Jewish... Y'know, the day I found out it was him? May 17th? It was Lag B'Omer, a day when you stop mourning in the middle of a time of mourning... I can stop mourning him, but, the mourning period isn't over. What he's been through...” God, Tony just wants to gather Steve up and hold him tight, but just as he's about to do so, Steve began again.

“Tony... While we were running, we ran into some hints... I can't confirm it... but the Winter Soldier probably killed your parents. I'm so, so sorry.”

Tony rocked back like he was hit as soon as Steve said that. Collapsing in his seat, his vision went a bit gray around the edges. Like it was coming from far away, Tony heard Steve's voice again. “Tony, Tony, are you okay? I'm sorry to spring this on you... Tony, can you hear me? Please, if you don't respond I'm going to have to call the doctors, I'm so sorry, Tony-”

Tony cut him off. “I'm okay, Captain. Just need to process. But thank you for telling me. Give me a minute, okay?” With that, an uncomfortable silence fell upon the room. Tony's mind whirred in place for a bit. He had spent so long hating Howard for killing his mother in that car accident, and now it was Cap's best friend. God, could nothing ever be easy between the two of them? First, all of Howard's lies, then whatever footage Fury showed Steve (Tony still hadn't gotten to the bottom of that, but the apologies from Steve had been epic, and things had been cold between him and Fury for _months_ over it) and Tony's own issues. Now this. With a deep breath, he knew he had to say something. “You said he was brainwashed? How do you know?”

“I assume you have the leaked files there? Look up the Winter Soldier. You'll see.” Steve then glanced around the room, and seeing the trash can near the bed, moved it closer to Tony with a wince.

“You shouldn't be moving around. If you needed that, I could have helped you.” Tony's voice was accusatory.

“Not for me. If you look at that video, you'll need it. I haven't even watched it yet, Nat just told me about it before she disappeared and you showed up.” Tony was starting to dread this, but he knew that he was going to have to do it. Maybe he could salvage his friendship with Steve, because he knew that if he ended up hating Bucky, Steve would be gone. Queueing up the video, Tony slipped on headphones. If it was that bad, he wasn't going to make Steve watch his best friend go through that.

A few hours and much vomit later, Tony found himself clutching Steve's hand tightly. “I'll help you find Bucky. And see what we can do to help him. _No one_ deserves all that. Absolutely no one.” Like he had before, Tony shoved down all the feelings that came with seeing Steve's face light up with hope.

“Really? You'll still help me?”

“Of course, Capsicle. What are friends for?”

Of course, life would throw its little curveballs. Despite pouring vast amounts of JARVIS's resources into the search, they weren't the ones to find Bucky. Well, Tony was the first to see him, but that's because it was what Bucky wanted. It was a Saturday afternoon early in October. Steve was in Europe checking on a destroyed Hydra base for any clues, when Bucky showed up in the lobby. Just walked in, gave his name to the receptionist, and asked to speak to Tony Stark, and for Captain America to not be alerted. Tony had him come up to the penthouse, unarmored, but with the bracelets for summoning the armor on him.

“So, Buckaroo Bonzai, what brings you to my tower? And to me, instead of your BFF Capsicle?” Tony's voice was light, but his eyes were searching every inch of Bucky, to see if he was a Hydra assassin or Cap's old friend.

“I needed to talk to you. I... I started to get my memories back, and you're the only one left I can apologize to.” Bucky's voice was hesitant, but not like he was unsure of what he was saying, more like he was unsure of what Tony would do. Tony did nothing but nod. While he was starting to figure out where Bucky was going with this, and it clearly was Bucky in front of him, he wanted to let it play out. Maybe then he could bring in Steve's old buddy. That would make Steve happy and he did want to make Steve happy.

“So, this is me, asking for forgiveness. For everyone else, I only have the choice to ask forgiveness from Hashem, but I can get forgiveness from you. And... it's the right time for me to do so. So, I guess this is me, asking. I'm so sorry I killed your parents. I'm sorry I did so without even remembering them until recently. They deserved better.” Bucky's voice was flat, but not in a way that indicated he didn't care. No, Tony's voice had been flat like that last time he had talked about his weapons. Bucky clearly cared too much. Right in that moment, Tony made a decision.

“It wasn't your fault. It was Hydra's. Them, I don't forgive. You, there is nothing to forgive, but in case you need to hear it, I forgive you. I do forgive you.” Then Tony got a surprise. Bucky broke down, crying. That's when he decided the situation was way out of his depth and it was time for a super-soldier reunion. “Hey, Deep Freeze? Can I call Steve and tell him you're here?”

Through his sobs, Bucky choked out, “You're not going to send me away? I didn't expect forgiveness, much less being able to stay.”

“Of course you can stay. Any friend of Capsicle's is welcome here. JARVIS, let the Captain know what is going on and for him to return.”

“Sir, it will take the Captain about ten hours to get here.” JARVIS didn't startle Bucky. Clearly the man had done his research.

“Okay, Terminator, let me show you to your rooms.” That, however, startled Bucky enough to end the sobbing.

“My rooms? You're not going to lock me up?”

“Of course not! As soon as Cappybara said he was going out to look for you, I set up a set of rooms for you. You're his best friend, it's the least I can do.” Bucky gave Tony a closer look, one that had Tony avoiding his gaze.

“So you and Steve are friends, then?”

“Sure. Capabana is great! C'mere, I'll show you where you can wait for him, then I can go back to my work before Pepper brains me with a Louboutin.” Of course, when they reached the suite Tony had set up for Bucky, he was speechless. Finally he managed to choke something out.

“Stark... This is bigger than all the places I've ever lived _combined_. I don't need this much space!”

“Use it or don't, it's all yours! If you need something to eat, there's food in the communal area we started in. Now, I'll get to work, and you can freshen up for when Cap-o-rama arrives. You've got clothes in the bedroom closet.” Tony then fled the room while Bucky was still sputtering about his generosity.

Of course, Tony had Steve back in the Tower a bit faster than humanly possible. The tearful reunion of the two long-lost friends didn't have Tony tearing up (JARVIS had the pictures saved in the most secure part of his server) but he was glad to see them together. The long thankful hug he got from a grateful Captain America didn't hurt, either. It was very solid, and warm, and comfortable. And Tony immediately went to trying to figure out how to help Steve's buddy get better.

Tony actually began the process by talking to the UN Secretary-General, a Wakandan. He figured that if the US government wasn't trustworthy, and it clearly wasn't thanks to Hydra, maybe a UN run by a black man (given Hydra's Nazism) would be able to protect Barnes and shed light on his status as a victim rather than a criminal. The Secretary-General not only was helpful when it came to protecting Bucky, he was downright helpful with the recovery, too. After swearing Tony to secrecy (at least for the moment, apparently there were plans to reveal this, and Tony's timing just gave him a head start) the Secretary-General introduced him to the smartest teenager he'd met since himself, or possibly ever, on the clearest, crispest video call he'd ever been on. Apparently Princess Shuri had an idea for deprogramming the brainwashing out of Bucky's head. And Wakanda had more advanced technology than he did. Tony foresaw some long nights in the workshop. He was a futurist, he could see how bright the future was if he and Shuri kept challenging each other to greater heights.

The only downside? No one could go with Bucky. Wakanda was not ready to admit more outsiders than it had to. Tony sat the two supersoldiers down to discuss the plan.

“So, Steve, Bucky. I talked to the UN, and we're good there. The Secretary-General was incredibly helpful, and he even has plans for removing the brainwashing. The only problem is that the plan is Wakanda, and Bucky would have to go alone.” They both looked puzzled. “Before I explain why Wakanda can help, you both need to promise not to tell anyone until Wakanda themselves reveal this.”

Steve instantly promised, in a way that warmed Tony's heart. “Of course. I trust you.”

Bucky quickly echoed. “Please. I'll do anything.” That was like a bucket of cold water over Tony's head. Bucky deserved every bit of help, and what had been done to him was unconscionable.

“Okay. So, apparently Wakanda is actually incredibly advanced when it comes to technology, they've just been hiding it. The reason for the change is that the current king's nephew spent most of his life here in the States, and, well, decided that things need to change. The crown prince, T'Challa, got behind the effort, and soon they're going to reveal at least some of the technology. T'Challa's sister is a bonafide genius, maybe even smarter than me, and she's got some of the best technology to build on, so she's got plans and ideas. Thing is? Wakanda is not open to outsiders. Bucky, you can go because you're the one being helped, but no one can go with you. I trust them, though. I've known the Secretary-General for years, he's a Wakandan, and I trust him. The rest of the UN? I don't trust them at all, but this man, I do.”

“If you wanted to kill me, you could have already. I trust you're trying to help. I'll give anything a shot, anyway.” Bucky's desperation showed in his voice, which probably affected Steve's own response.

“Tony, thank you. You've done so much already. I'll worry about Bucky, of course, but if it's you telling me this is a solution, I'll believe you.” Only years of practice at being in the public eye kept Tony from blushing at Steve's trust. He knew the two of them were friends, but he didn't realize how much the supersoldier trusted him.

While plans still had to be made, that conversation ended any discussion of an alternative. Soon, probably quicker than Steve was comfortable with, Bucky was heading to Wakanda. Tony was there to witness the two of them parting.

“Don't do anything stupid till I get back.” Tony could hear the wry humor in Bucky's voice, a sharp contrast to the wetness of holding back tears in Steve's.

“How could I? You're taking all the stupid with you.” The hug after Steve said that made Tony feel like a voyeur. He wondered, not for the first time, if maybe the two of them were more than friends. Still, Bucky departed quickly after the hug.

After Bucky's departure, Steve followed Tony into the common room. “Thank you. Thank you for doing everything you can to get me my brother back.”

“Of course, Steve. You know, if you were more than brothers, you could tell me.” Tony braced himself for the response, only to startle at something completely different from what he expected.

Steve started laughing. A gorgeous, heartfelt laugh. “Oh, Tony, no. Bucky knew my preferences, but he's a ladies' man through and through. Also, he's too much like my brother for me to ever think about that way. He's family, but I never had romantic feelings for him. Heck, being family ruined more than one relationship for him. No one was exactly eager to date me, but Buck, Bucky brought home all the girls. Thing is, he also dropped everything if I was sick. More than one left him when he wasn't available to dance when I was ill. I owe him... everything.” Towards the end of the story, Steve's voice grew soft, but it still sounded that it was easier for Steve to tell than any previous story Tony had heard about Bucky Barnes.

Tony reached out and patted Steve on the arm, which led to a hug. Steve held him tightly, and offered his thanks, again. “Tony, thank you so much. You got me my brother back, and are arranging for him to be helped. I can never repay you.”

“Big guy, don't worry. You don't owe me anything.”

After that, their friendship grew even closer, while Bucky was away in Wakanda. And if Tony was pining, well, he was careful to make sure Steve never knew.


	3. Chapter 3

When Bucky came back, about five months later, he came back to a Tony and Steve who were thick as thieves. Not that Steve didn't drop everything to spend time with him, but more that whenever Bucky asked for alone time, Steve would be with Tony. All the time. Given that, Bucky started to spend time with Tony. Bucky would go looking for Steve, and find him in the workshop with Tony. That led to the time when Steve was asleep, and suddenly Bucky was again in the workshop with Tony.

Hours later, Bucky’s head poked up to see Steve sketching on the couch. Tony and he had been working for hours, and were currently deep in a set of schematics for automated vacuums that could double as protective bots. Bucky had no idea why Tony kept calling the plan “Stabby the Roomba” though. When Bucky saw Steve, his heart melted. Steve was looking at Tony with this soft, gentle look on his face. Bucky’s memories were back, he knew the punk well. Steve was crushing, hard, on the genius.

Fortunately, Bucky had also figured out during the hours of conversation that the crush was returned. Now, to sit, wait and see if it was something serious or just infatuation.

Bucky got his answer sooner than he expected. A couple weeks after the first (but not the last) time Steve found them in the shop, he was holding a tiny Passover seder. He expected it to be just himself and Steve, and he wasn’t even cooking. Bucky had asked JARVIS about supplying food to make, and JARVIS had offered the services of the Tower chefs. Given the amount of food necessary for a proper seder, Bucky took JARVIS up on the offer, only making his Mama’s gefilte fish from scratch when he tasted some jarred gefilte fish after learning it was the most common kind available. He was not a fan of the jarred variety, but he couldn’t imagine a seder without the dish, so it would be the one thing he prepared.

Preparing it might actually have been good for him. He was able to take a gentle walk through some happier memories, and get ready for leading a seder, since he was the Jewish one. About five minutes before Steve was due, he made sure everything was plated up the way he wanted, and everything was ready to sit for a while while they went through the first part of the seder. He was surprised to hear from the hallway Tony’s voice speaking to Steve. “We’re going to a seder? A Jewish seder? I thought you were Catholic, given the way you end up at Mass every Sunday!”

Steve’s reply also came through to his super-soldier ears. “Tony, I told you about growing up with Bucky. Part of that is that I ended up at all the Jewish celebrations that were okay for a young goyische friend to show up at. One of those was the Passover seder. This… This might mean as much to me as to Bucky, okay?”

Bucky strained his ears to listen in on the silence. Clearly this was more than a crush if Steve was both bringing Tony here and being this open with him. The question was whether Tony felt the same way. The response he heard had him hopeful, though given he didn’t know Tony as well as Steve, he wasn’t as sure. “Of course Steve. If it’s important to you, I’ll be there. I just don’t know anything about this at all.”

Steve’s laugh was bright and joyful as the door opened. Bucky smiled to hear it. “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure you get through it okay.”

“So, Steve, you ready to get this show on the road?” Bucky wasn’t nervous, exactly, but he also hadn’t hosted a seder since 1938, the year his father was ill and couldn’t lead, so he took over.

“One thing first, jerk. I found this in all the stuff I was given from the Smithsonian. Here. It’s your Haggadah.” Bucky saw a small, olive-green booklet emerge from a pocket he hadn’t noticed.

“Damn. I haven’t seen that since 1941.” Bucky was about to continue when two more olive-green booklets emerged.

“To make it easier I found a couple more. That one was yours, these two, well, I asked Pepper, and they appeared.”

As soon as Steve mentioned Pepper’s usual efficiency, Tony laughed, breaking some of the tension. “Of course she did. Compared to the things I’ve asked her, a couple vintage Haggadahs wouldn’t even be hard.”

Bucky found himself grateful for the small break. Holding that Haggadah in his hands brought his past right up to the forefront. These were happy memories, and he wanted to take a moment to enjoy them. Shaking himself out, he found Steve and Tony had gone silent. _“Idiots.”_ was all he was thinking as he watched them attempt to look at each other surreptitiously. Passover was a time for new beginnings, and he was going to use this seder to make the two of them realize they were both head over heels for each other. Hopefully he’d be able to do it without falling too much into his own issues, but then, doing stupid things for the punk was how he lived his life.

“So, Tony, did Steve explain anything about this before he dragged you here? I know he’s familiar with how things go, but I don’t know if you know anything.” Bucky could almost have regretted the question, because Tony immediately went tense. Still, he wanted to make sure Tony was comfortable. Without him, Bucky wasn’t sure where he’d be, and with him, well, he’d found his brother and a new home.

“Nope. I’ve never been to a seder before. Multiculturalism wasn’t exactly encouraged when I was growing up.” Well, that explained the tension. Bucky had no idea what had happened to Howard, or even what he had done to Tony, but Tony’s reactions every time he came up told him it was nothing good. At least if that was the problem, keeping going past the tension should fix it.

“Well, that’s fine. Basically, a seder’s the ritual meal for the holiday of Passover. We read the Haggadah, which both tells the story of the exodus from Egypt and the rabbis arguing about it. Sometimes, there’s discussion and we argue, too. We eat some special food, and drink wine. It’ll take a few hours. Usually there are more people, but I think many more would be too much. Maybe next year.” Bucky explained it, perhaps a bit too simply for Tony, but he wasn’t going to go too in depth when they were about to get through it.

Tony took a deep breath. “Okay. Let’s give this a go.” They all took their seats around the table, and opened the vintage Haggadahs.

As soon as they were all seated, Bucky took a deep breath. These might be people he had nothing to fear from, but this was the first seder he had been to, much less led, in a very long time. He didn’t have much to worry about, though. The tension was broken very quickly as Tony looked over the first couple pages that described the seder.

“Waitasec, you mean this Haggadah was put out as a _marketing ploy?_ This bit here, it’s, well, it’s clearly marketing.” Tony started to read aloud “And so General Foods Corporation, packers of Maxwell House Coffee, whose relations with the Jewish people have always been most friendly, take pleasure in presenting this new, up-to-date edition of The Haggadah, arranged in a most simplified and attractive form. They also take great pleasure in extending best wishes for a happy and joyous holiday.”

Bucky laughed, which turned into a genuine smile as he saw Steve smiling at his laugh. “Oh definitely a marketing ploy. You got a free copy with the purchase of Maxwell House coffee, and since that’s what we were drinking, it was basically free. And, despite the gimmick of it, it’s a good, solid Haggadah. And you’re even getting into the spirit! We take turns reading some of the sections.” 

Tony grinned. “Well, at least if it was a marketing ploy, it was apparently a quality marketing ploy. It also sounds like an interesting experience. Let’s go.”

The wine was poured in the cups, and the Kiddush was said. After that first cup, Tony had to make a comment. “Well, this is a good way to get started.”

“Well, at least the wine is better than the Manischewitz we grew up with.” Bucky rolled his eyes at the fond memories of Seders past and the less fond memories of the taste of Manischewitz wine.

“Only the best kosher wine for my Tower, Buckaroo.” Bucky was so happy to see Tony’s genuine smile at that part. He may have been nervous but this Seder was actually a great idea. So many happy feelings right now. Of course, given the three of them, it wasn’t all going to be happy camaraderie.

“Okay, Tony, you’re the youngest. You get to read the Four Questions.” Steve’s grin could politely be described as _shit eating_. Tony’s scowl was thunderous.

“You’ve been living less years, Capsicle!” 

“Yes, but I was born before you, and that’s what matters!”

As they continued their back and forth, Bucky began to giggle, quietly. God, they were both perfect for each other and so much fun to watch. Clearly getting them together would be awesome for his entertainment. Finally he decided to interrupt the argument. “Tony, you can read it in English, and Steve, you’ve got the Hebrew.”

The archaic wording actually worked well coming from Tony, and Bucky could see Steve’s face, fascinated by the short recital. “Wherefore is this night distinguished from all other nights?” Tony spoke in the English. As soon as he finished, Steve began the Hebrew version, which took far longer, because he sang.

“Ma nishtana halaylo hazeh mikol haleilois?” As he continued, the strong baritone singing a melody Bucky hadn’t realized he remembered, a soft smile came to Bucky’s face. Maybe this would all be okay.

That didn’t mean it wasn’t difficult. Bucky had to consciously decide to not connect his story of slavery to Hydra to the Passover story. Maybe in bits and pieces, but here, at the beginning of the night, he’d rather bask in his current freedom rather than reflecting on his past bondage. He was saved, to be with these wonderful people, and that’s where he was going to focus. 

Of course, he didn’t count on Steve being Steve. Who had to bring it up. “Hey, Buck, you okay? This story just seems very familiar.” Bucky groaned internally. It took him less than one paragraph after the Four Questions to bring it up.

“Yeah, punk. I’m free now, that’s the important part.” Okay, maybe a Seder being his first major Jewish event with his friends was a strongly informed choice, but he was definitely focusing on the important part. It helped that very quickly Tony got distracted by the rabbinical argument playing out on page.

“How much can they read into anything? Is this what Judaism is like? Arguing about words? Really? Seriously?” Tony’s hands were moving in grand gestures, and Bucky again caught Steve watching. Apparently neither of them could see what was right in front of their faces. 

“Actually, Tony, that is a lot of what Judaism is like. Rabbis, especially historical ones, had a lot of arguments, and studied every word of the Torah in minute detail. It’s kind of fun, though. The idea that more than one person can be right.” That shut Tony up, surprisingly, and he sat back with a thoughtful look on his face.

A different argument played out on the next page, this time one looking at the text itself. Admittedly, Bucky sparked it, from a half-remembered discussion from his childhood, early enough it was probably human memory, not Hydra’s doing, that made it faint. “So, you see here, on the section about the wicked son? How it says ‘This is done, because of what the Eternal did for me, when I went forth from Egypt;’ ‘for me and not for him; for had he been there, he would not have been thought worthy to be redeemed’? Well, right on the next page, discussing the son who cannot ask, ‘And thou shalt relate to thy son on that day, this is done because of what the Eternal did for me, when I went forth from Egypt.’ How does it, in one place, make a big deal out of the word ‘me’ but then in the next one, uses it clearly more positively?” And Steve and Tony were off. Bucky, having gotten them started, just sat back and let their words wash over him as he slid back to the happy memories of his family having the same argument ninety years previously.

Eventually the two of them wound down. They were all grinning. Maybe this was the best idea Bucky had ever had, and he hadn’t even expected Tony to be there. They were having a wonderful Seder. One with little else of note until they reached the talk of the plagues. Bucky wasn’t even sure which one of them said it first, it might have even been him. “But the innocent-”

Bucky cut whoever it was off. “No. We are not discussing that part of the plagues.” There may be a moral discussion to be had, but he was not yet in a place where it could happen. The Egyptians were still Hydra in his brain and he wasn’t ready to look at the differences.

Tony blinked at his vehemence “Okay, Bucky. You good?”

Before Bucky could answer Tony, Steve slung his arm around him. “Let us know if anything gets to be too much, okay?”

Absolutely unable to deal with how much he loved his two friends, Bucky ducked his head. “I will. Can we just read this part and not discuss it?” With murmurs of agreement, they continued until they reached the end of the plagues, and a song Bucky and Steve both insisted on singing.

It didn’t take long before Tony was joining in on the chorus since Bucky decided he was going to sing all fourteen verses. It wasn’t hard- Dayenu tended to stick in the mind easily. When the song was over, that was when Bucky decided to thank Tony. The song gave him an idea of a way to do it. “Tony, I just wanted to let you know, you have done so much for me. If you had just let me go without hurting me, it would have been enough, but not only did you get me help, you have welcomed me into your home and become my friend.” Continuing as Tony opened his mouth to try to interrupt, “Really, I know you’re going to say it was nothing, but it means everything to me. Thank you so much.”

At this point Tony managed to slide in a word. “Of course, Buckster. I couldn’t do otherwise.” And while Bucky knew something like this would often come out teasing from the genius, this time it was sincere. Quite, heartfelt, Bucky knew Tony believed it. Maybe he was good enough for his best friend.

Steve, well, Bucky knew his best friend Stevie was both thrilled that the two of them and just wanted everyone to be happy. In fact, looking at Steve’s face, Bucky caught the happy smile. Everything was right in the world.

Which, of course, didn’t mean that the emotions were done for the evening. When it came to anything other than each other Tony and Steve were both very perceptive. This did not make Bucky very happy, when practically simultaneously a couple paragraphs later they both, in their own words, asked Bucky if he was okay.

Glaring was his response of choice. “You know, I’m fine. You two could pay more attention to each other and less to me, you know.” He then sighed internally when they both looked confused. Still, it got them off his back about how he felt about the lines about personally going forth from Egypt, given he had just been rescued from his own form of slavery. That was a plus. He wasn’t really up for talking about it, he just wanted to enjoy the tradition.

The three of them dashed through the last few psalms before the part which Steve had, at one point, referred to as the appetizers. Really, it was the blessing over the matzo and eating that, the maror and the charoset, each with the appropriate blessings. The unfamiliarity presumably was what led Tony to ask, “What in God’s name am I eating?”

Bucky actually laughed at that. “Tony, you do realize you’re literally eating it in God’s name? And it’s horseradish, an apple, nut, wine, and cinnamon mixture, and unleavened bread, or basically a cracker.” Tony spluttered a bit, and Bucky heard Steve snort. Looking over, the snort was clearly because Steve was attempting to smother his giggles. When Tony realized that, he responded.

“Were you any better the first time you ate this, Capsicle?” When Steve turned bright red, Tony grinned triumphantly, and looked over at Bucky.

Satisfied, Bucky gave away a story he was sure his best friend would rather have left unsaid. “Oh, he was nicer in what he said- but he took such a huge bite of horseradish, he had to run to the bathroom to throw up!”

Tony looked over at Steve while laughing. “Hmm, Steve, I wonder how far down that blush travels?” Bucky looked at Steve wordlessly sputtering in response and knew the night would end with a new relationship.

Dinner followed that exchange, where talk was kept light, and food was very much enjoyed. Bucky was nervous when his homemade gefilte fish was served, but the compliments he got were very sincere. He did have to speak at that point. “Apparently most gefilte fish these days is jarred. I tried some, but for your own sakes, don’t. Homemade is the only way to go. The future might have some wonderful bits, but mass produced gefilte fish isn’t one of them.” The meal sped along, and before they all realized it, the last bit of matzo, known as the Aphikomon, at least in Bucky’s accent, had been eaten.

“Now, fellas, remember, no more food tonight. And Tony, we’ve still got a ways to go.” Bucky took a deep breath. This was where he had to be the leader. Channeling his father, he began the blessing after meals. “Rabosai mir vellen bentschen.”

Steve responded instantly, but Tony, like he had several times that night, appeared fairly confused. Steve’s voice was sure, though. “Y’hei shem HaShem m’vorach m’atoh v’ad oylam.”

And they were off. Even the bits he didn’t have a tune to, he lost Tony in following the Hebrew of his tradition, wrapped in the familiarity. Not only was this done at seders, but every holiday meal had a version of the Birkat HaMazon. Fortunately it wasn’t very long before he hit a mention of Passover in it, as part of it changed to match each holiday, but that one line was enough for him to stop and explain what was going on, because Tony looked absolutely baffled.

“So, Tony, this is the Jewish version of grace after a meal, basically. Sorry to get lost in it.” Even in front of these two, Bucky wasn’t going to elaborate further.

“Oh, it’s fine. Don’t worry. You both have wonderful singing voices, you know.” Tony’s response brought another soft, proud smile to Steve’s face. Bucky was going to have to make sure to have them kiss at the end of the seder. But not now. He wanted to finish the seder before the two of them got lost in each other, and he had the feeling that a kiss would be all it would take.

“Well, let’s continue.” As they continued, Bucky was careful to not discuss the bit about Jerusalem being rebuilt. His emotions on seeing Jews praying at the Western Wall were private, even from Steve.

He did decide to troll Tony while being perfectly honest and kind by staring at him directly while blessing the head of the house, and skipping the bit about the ‘mistress of the house’ and ‘their children’. Maybe next year he could absolutely mock Steve by saying the mistress part while staring right at him. Tony, for his part, was absolutely confused, because Bucky had seen while he claimed the house as his, he also never really saw it as his household. Which was both adorable and sad. Another reason to push him to Steve. Steve would get Tony to see that he was the one who made his house a home.

After singing the Hebrew, they read the English for the prayer for peace. “May He who maketh peace in his high heavens, grant peace unto us, and all Israel, and let us say, Amen.” As they finished, Tony spoke up before they could continue on.

“You know, that’s why I do this, Avenging. To bring peace to everyone. This… this speaks to me. I didn’t expect this to do so when I came here, I just expected to keep you both company. First, seeing how you felt, I realized this meant something, just watching how much it meant to you, but now it means something just to me. Thank you.” Bucky was thrilled. He was happy to give Tony something, given how much the man had helped him, and the heart eyes Steve was sprouting at Tony didn’t hurt, either. 

The next bit of the seder went quickly until they found themselves nearly at the end. Bucky said, “L’shono habo’ah biyerushalyim” As they read the translation, Tony had an offer.

“You know, I could make it next year in Jerusalem. Would you want that?”

Bucky just smiled and shook his head. “Thank you for the offer, but for next year, well, I’ll tell you in a bit. This is just symbolic.” Bucky was just ready for them to kiss already. He wasn’t even the one kissing, and he was nervous with anticipation.

The end of the seder came, the last of the wine had been drunk, and before Bucky could tell the two of them to kiss, Steve made a challenge. “Hey, Buck, you know that song? Echod Mi Yodea? I bet now that we’re supersoldiers we can do that last stanza all in one breath.” Well, with a challenge like that, Bucky wasn’t about to back down, and they sang the whole song until they got to the last stanza. Tony, who couldn’t understand a word but got the point, looked forward to seeing if they could manage the last stanza. The song built on itself, each stanza adding a bit before repeating the previous stanzas. When they reached the last stanza, Steve and Bucky both took a deep breath, and sang the whole thing in unison.

“Shlosha asar mi yodea? Shlosha asar ani yodea. Shlosha asar miday’ya. S’nem asar shivtay’ya. Echod asar cochvay’ya. Asarah dibray’ya. Tisha yarchei l’dah. Shmonah yamei mila. Shivah yamei shabtsa. Shisha sidrei mishnah. Hamishah humshei Torah. Arbah eimahot. Shlosha avot. Sh’ne luchos hab’ris. Echod elohenu shebashomayim u’vo’oretz.”

Tony started to ask what the heck they were singing, then Steve opened his haggadah to the right page and pointed. “Okay, so you sang this whole thing? Let’s see…” Tony read the paragraph they had just sung in Hebrew in it’s English translation. “Who knoweth thirteen? I, saith Israel, know thirteen: there are thirteen divine attributes, twelve tribes, eleven stars, ten commandments, nine months preceding child-birth, eight days preceding circumcision, seven days in the week, six books of the Mishnah, five books of the Law, four matrons, three patriarchs, tw tablets of the covenant; but One is the Eternal who is above heaven and earth.” After finishing, Tony took a deep breath. “How did you manage to sing that in one breath? Is your breath control really that good?”

Bucky saw his opportunity and took it. “He’s been looking at you all night, Tony. Why don’t you kiss him and find out?”

Steve’s immediate response was “Bucky! You didn’t have to tell him!”

Tony, realizing that meant Steve was actually looking at him, was also not one to waste an opportunity handed on a silver platter. He leaned over and gave Steve a long kiss. When they pulled away from each other, they just looked into each other’s eyes.

Bucky smiled. “Okay, boys. What I want for next year is for you two to be here, together. Now, enjoy.” With that, he took his leave. Tony saved him. This may not pay him back, but at least he knew he could do something for his friend. Passover was for new beginnings, and this was a good one for all of them.


End file.
